~A Bitter Swallow~

I think I thought-vomited in my brain a little bit...

Thought-Vomit

My brain is constantly mumbling and muttering to itself. Sometimes it screams. Sometimes what it has to say is interesting enough to make note of, or is adamant enough that it must come out. I'll put that stuff here. :)
Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Stress

I've been sitting here under an undue amount of stress lately. I know I shouldn't let that go on, but I'm not really sure how to let go of it. I was reading a blog I follow here, and she was talking about how here "resolution" for this year is to let go. May I mention here that I find this woman incredible in her strength and convictions. Anyway... much of what this gal says hits home, and this did, too. I think some areas of my psyche would greatly benefit from me being able to just let go of some junk. It's like my cluttered house. My brain is so cluttered that I can't maneuver around in there. I need to clean some of that junk out. Yard sale, maybe?

There are things I need to deal with, work on, plain let go of and move on. The problem is, I'm not sure how to do all these things. Which ones do I confront? Which ones do I simply walk away from? And by walking away, am I really letting go, or merely running from them some more? How far should I delve into these things? Am I going to only wind up stirring the pot and hurting myself even more by analyzing some of this crap?

I know I'm being really vauge. I'm not giving much information to work off of here. The truth of the matter is, one of these issues are trust issues, and the fear of others seeing my inner sides. The issues are things I'm not certain I really want made public in this way.

All I know is that the stress is wearing on me, and it's starting to show to those around me. I'm physically and emotionally exhausted. When people ask "What's wrong?", I don't know how to answer. I don't know how to answer it to myself yet.

2 comments:

kathryn said...

Well, I'd imagine the first step is to find someone you trust to talk to about this. You'd be amazed what a fresh perspective can do to change the way you look at things. But, it's gota be face-to -face...so you can REALLY explain the issues thoroughly.

Then, you break it down. that's what mom always said to do. If you look at everything as a whole, it's overwhelming.

Accumulate Man said...

Some things just take time to work through. You'll know when it's time to let go of something. Just breathe, drink plenty of water, love your friends and family to within an inch of your life, talk about stuff that bothers you with smart, well adjusted, non judgemental pals, and before yo know it you'll find that you've landed in this brand new place, one complete with a clean well ordered mind, a decluttered house and life poised on the edge of the next great adventure. W

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