~A Bitter Swallow~

So, I've been wanting to start getting up earlier. I want to go back to needing less sleep- be once again one of those "late to bed, early to rise" people like I was. Stupid aging.
I digress.
Anyway... what I did not have in mind was waking at 3:30 this morning! *slap forehead*

I'm tired. I thought I was going to be sick by the time I left the house at 8:30am. By my break at 12:15, I was tired, but okay. Now, I'm doing much better than I anticipated. I'm curious as to whether that will all break down the moment I walk through the door at home, though. Bummer is, I can't go to sleep when I get home. Slacker me hasn't been on the treadmill since I don't remember, and no exercise since the Friday before this past one (so the 14th?). Bad, bad me. And I had vowed "no excuses" tonight. American Idol is on, so I have something to watch. Kids are gone, so I don't have that distraction. So... NO EXCUSES! Which means I need to drag my tired butt onto that treadmill for at least 30 minutes tonight.

Hey... I'll sleep good tonight, eh?

I don't feel well today. My lunch idea was a bad one. I went to China Sun, but my taste buds just weren't into it. Oh well. better food than i would have eaten at McD's. And about the same cost. I had to leave early though, because the bustle of people was bothering me. The light and sound is not meshing well with my brain today. I paid for my measly lunch, and went back out to my car. In the parking lot at the library, I sat for awhile and continued to read my book, until all the coffee and water I had drank this morning was no longer willing to wait. Then I sat in the break room, in the chair next to the window, with the nice cool breeze, and the comfort of the sun rays hugging me. I read some more, until time to work.

Now here I am. Working.

I'm so tired. So tired lately. But I sleep. And I dream. I wonder if it's the dreams that are the culprit of my sleepiness. I dream, but they are busy, restless dreams, and I think I wake frequently during them. My eyes are heavy and leaded. It takes all my efforts to keep them open. I am looking forward to tomorrow's workday end, whereupon I can go home and just sleep. Sleep until I am not tired anymore.

Maybe I'm still sick. Those sick bugs are clawing their way through; refusing to die completely off.

Or maybe it's all the caffiene.

I feel like such a whiner. Part of me doesn't care. If I can't whine here, where can I?